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Mother-Daughter Advice

April 18, 2018

With school graduations, I find myself reflecting on my daughter’s collegiate and my own career achievements. To her I say: “Keep adding to your value; from here on out, it’s up to you to study what you like. Your liberal arts degree is a means to understand and adapt to the world that lies before you.” Here are some of my lesson notes to share with Shea, and you, my readers.


Get a mentor.  Build a real relationship first. It’s a more natural process and creates a stronger base than ‘asking for a mentor’. In a mentor, look for a good person first, above someone who you perceive can help you. And if you’re fortunate, you’ll have a great woman boss, who you will one day emulate.


Be a risk taker!  Take a seat at the head of the table. I did. It’s a strong space – literally and figuratively - from which to deal with conflict. Practice taking a full-view scan of the situation, then make a decision. You can’t deny when you are a leader. You come by it; it’s in your DNA.


Don’t become a cynic… Trust. Please. We are born pure and develop scripts about trust versus cynicism.  If you’re unsure, you’re not alone. According to Edelman Trust Barometer we have destroyed trust over the decades. They call it a ‘trust implosion’. Okay, fine. It is done unto you as YOU BELIEVE. Go manifest trust!


Worth. Never doubt your worth; keep doing what you care most about. Hold fast to your vision, because realization may be farther out than you think. (Know that women sometimes need to push harder.)


Recall high worth women who’ve believed in you and helped me pave the way: Evelyn Logan, Margaret Pruitt, Tasha Eurich, Jennifer Whitlow, Betsy Doughty, Sonja Baro, Jenny Shedd, Ashley Passow, Tami Palmer, Corey Livingston, Diane Murphy, Kim Peterson Stone, Melannie O’Connor, Jennifer Joyce, Leigh Steere, Tracy Mestas Cook and Lynda Mottershead.


Value. Understand your value to those who want to use your creativity and talents. You have a calling, not just a means to earn your keep. So strive to become and be good at what you do– Along your career path, leverage your passion for learning to discover the right ‘weightlifting for your brain’. Personal Development: It will serve you always.


Take care of your relationships.  Since I graduated from UNC-CH, I’ve watched people come and go from one another’s lives. Job positions shift, marriages can dissolve, companies and families experience endings through the process of time. But what remains unchanged: The value of our friendships along the way. Friends make the journey worthwhile. Take good care of them.

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